|
|
"I'm sorry, Carter. We did everything we could to save her, but her injuries were too severe. We tried for 38 minutes to resuscitate her, but...she died."
Carter stared at Dr. Greene in disbelief. "Lucy's dead?" He backed away from Mark, shaking his head vehemently. I don't believe you!"
"I'm sorry, Carter," Mark repeated sadly. "We all are." He stepped forward, reaching out to touch Carter's arm, but Carter knocked it away angrily.
He wanted to scream "How could you let this happen? How could you let her die?" He wished he could strike out at Dr. Greene with his fists, but he just stood there, his hands clenched tightly at his sides. He suddenly started running and found himself in the abandoned trauma room. Lucy was lying there, looking so peaceful. Her skin was smooth and flawless, not a scratch on her. Taking shallow breaths, he slowly moved closer to her. It must be some mistake. She wasn't dead. She was just sleeping. Feeling the tiniest sliver of hope, he raised a trembling hand to her pale cheek. It was ice cold.
"Nooo," he moaned, squeezing his eyes shut.
"Dr. Carter..."
"Uhh..." he mumbled. "Leave me alone."
"Dr. Carter!" the voice insisted.
Carter awoke with a start, almost falling off the chair. His mouth was dry and his neck ached. He must have fallen asleep in the chair. He looked up to see the same nurse that had shown them to the room earlier. Her name was Cindy.
"I'm sorry to wake you. But you got a call from down in the ER," Cindy said quietly. "They want to see you."
"Ok, thanks. Tell them I'll be right down."
Carter rubbed the back of his neck, tilting it from side to side to work the kinks out. It had only been a dream...a nightmare. She was fine. He leaned in closer, watching the covers rise and fall in time with her rhythmic breathing. See, she's just sleeping. It was silly, but he had to be sure. He brushed his hand lightly against Lucy's cheek, visibly relaxing when it was warm to the touch. The dream had shaken him more than he cared to admit. He yawned, stretched and checked his watch. 2:30 am. He wasn't sure how long he'd been asleep. Maybe 45 minutes. He wondered what they wanted in the ER.
**********
"You really should get that cut sutured, Officer..."
"Davidson. Adam Davidson." The man winced as Mark gently probed around the edge of the cut. "I'm fine. Damn!" he cursed. "I still can't believe I let this happen."
"It's not your fault, Adam. I should have been there with you." Officer Bryan Jones looked at his partner with deep regret, knowing they were both in trouble.
Mark glanced down the hallway and saw Carter coming towards them. "Here he comes now. I thought Dr. Carter should be apprised of the situation."
Carter took in the scene before him with a frown. Officer Davidson was sitting in a chair in the hallway, holding an ice pack to the side of his face. Dr. Greene was kneeling beside him, examining a wound on his cheek. The other officer...what was his name...Jones, was looking at him with a guilty expression on his face.
"What's going on?" Carter asked stiffly, sensing he wasn't going to like the answer.
"Something's happened," Mark said hesitantly, rising to his feet. "I'll let Officer Davidson explain it to you."
Carter looked down at the police officer expectantly, as the older man tried to stand up. He was a little wobbly on his feet, however, and Mark urged him to sit back down.
"Well?" Carter said impatiently. He looked around the hallway, a sudden thought occurring to him. "Hey, where's..." He realized he didn't know the man's name. "Where's the guy? The guy that hit Lucy?"
"He's, uh..." Officer Davidson stammered. "He's missing."
"What do you mean...missing? What the hell happened?"
"Carter, take it easy," Mark warned. He realized a small crowd was gathering around them, mostly ER staff. "Maybe we should take this into one of the rooms," he suggested.
"No, we're fine out here," Carter snapped. "Now, what happened?"
Officer Davidson began to explain the situation. The suspect, who's name was Nick Kerrigan, had his cut sutured by one of the residents. He had then been handcuffed and escorted outside. As they had neared the police car, Kerrigan had insisted he had to use the men's room before leaving. Officer Davidson had reluctantly led him back into the hospital to use the washroom. Of course, he had to uncuff the man to let him do his business.
"That's when he attacked me with some kind of pipe," the officer continued. "There was a pile of them near the sinks. Some ongoing maintenance job, I guess. It was my fault. I really wasn't expecting it. He had been so docile until then, not putting up any kind of resistance. I let my guard down, and I shouldn't have. I'm sorry."
Carter pursed his lips, nodding. "Great, you're sorry." He looked at the other officer accusingly. "And where were you during all this?"
Officer Jones blushed, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He was a rookie...younger than his partner, maybe around Carter's age. "I...I waited to hear what Miss Knight's condition was. Then I went to that diner across the street, Doc something, for a cup of coffee. When I came out, I saw Adam's car still parked outside so I knew something was wrong. I went back into the hospital to look for him. It took a little while, but I found him on the floor of the washroom, unconscious. Kerrigan was gone."
Carter felt like punching his fist through the wall in frustration. This was unbelievable! He struggled to remain calm. "So what happens now?"
"We know his name. We know where he lives," Officer Davidson answered. "We've got a patrol car outside his apartment, as we speak. My guess is, he'll lie low for a while. But he's gotta show up sometime." He looked Carter directly in the eye. "We'll get him," he promised.
Carter didn't trust himself to speak, feeling a sarcastic reply on the tip of his tongue. So, he remained silent.
"All right, Officer Davidson, let's get that cut looked after," Mark said, helping him to his feet. "Lydia, could you please take him to the suture room?"
Lydia led the officer away, while the other staff members still lingered around. They talked quietly amongst themselves, occasionally giving Carter sympathetic looks. He ignored all of them. Mark looked at him with concern.
"How are you doing, Carter?"
"Fine," he replied shortly.
"You're off today, aren't you?" Carter simply nodded. "So why don't you go on home? Lucy's resting comfortably now."
"Can't. Car battery's dead. And I assume the El is still down." He didn't add that he wouldn't have left anyway. He wanted to be here for Lucy.
"Oh, that's right. Lydia told me about your car." Mark looked at the stubborn set of Carter's face and guessed correctly that he wasn't going anywhere. Well, considering what Lucy had done for Carter, he supposed he would do the same thing in Carter's position. "Why don't you catch some shut-eye in one of the exam rooms, then? I don't imagine it's too comfortable sleeping in one of those chairs in Lucy's room." The nurse on the third floor had told him that Carter had been dozing by Lucy's side.
Carter didn't feel very sleepy...he was still too angry with the police. But he did feel dead tired. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. He would just lie down for a little while. "Ok," he agreed. "But can someone come and get me in an hour? I want to check on Lucy later."
"Sure. I'll let Jerry know."
"What's open?"
"Take your pick. And Carter..." Mark waited until Carter turned around and looked at him. "They'll find him."
Carter entered the nearest exam room and collapsed on the bed with a sigh. Oh yeah, he was tired. He closed his eyes and was snoring within a minute.
**********
A dark figure stood, staring at the sleeping man. He had been just inside the doors, listening to the two doctors talking in the hallway. Then he had scurried back into the shadows when one of them had entered the room. Although it was dark, there was enough light pouring in through the small window of the door.
He studied the snoring man's face. Yes, this was the one. He wanted to complete his mission now. He had failed earlier. Had failed miserably and injured an innocent girl. He had to see for himself that the girl was all right. The doctor had said he would check on her later. So he would have to wait. That was fine. He had waited this long. He could wait a little while longer.
He retreated back into the shadows.
**********
"Dr. Carter?"
"We shouldn't...Luce...mmm..." Carter murmured, hugging her closer to him, trailing kisses down her neck.
"Dr. Carter?" Jerry watched in amusement as Carter hugged a pillow to his chest, burying his face in it. "CARTER!"
"Huh? What?" Carter blinked sleepily and squinted his eyes against the light coming in through the open door. "What's wrong, Jerry?"
"Nothing. Dr. Greene told me to wake you in an hour, but you wouldn't budge. I let you sleep a little longer, so it's close to 5:30 now."
"Oh, right...thanks."
"No problem." Jerry couldn't resist adding, "That must have been some dream you were having."
"Shut up, Jerry." Carter could hear him laughing down the hallway. He sat up, running a hand through his already tousled hair. The lovely dream was beginning to recede now, and he couldn't quite remember what it had been about.
Carter went back up to the third floor and stopped at the nurse's station. Cindy smiled to see him again. It was touching to see the concern this young doctor had for Miss Knight.
"How is she?" Carter asked, holding back a yawn.
"Fine. She seems to be sleeping well. Her temperature and pulse are normal."
"Good. I'm going to look in on her for a minute. I won't be long."
"Take your time." Cindy came around the desk. "I'm going to check on another patient." She proceeded down the other end of the hall.
Carter walked down to Lucy's room and found she was indeed sleeping soundly. He saw her shift slightly under the covers, burrowing more deeply underneath. He thought she might be cold and pulled the blanket up higher. He went to the closet, where an extra blanket was usually stored. This one was empty, and he decided to check another closet in an unoccupied room. He made his way soundlessly down the hallway. Three doors down, he was able to find what he was looking for. He returned to Lucy's room and found a man standing over her.
Alarm bells went off in his head and Carter stared at him through the open doorway.
"Who are..." The man turned his head and Carter gasped in recognition. "Kerrigan!"
"At your service." Kerrigan smiled. He looked back down at Lucy and his smile faded. "Will she be all right?"
Carter's mind was a jumble of thoughts. He was tempted to tackle Kerrigan and yell for security. But he couldn't very well do that with Lucy lying there helplessly. What the hell was he doing here? He was supposed to have run away. Isn't that why he had struck Officer Davidson with the pipe? To flee and escape the drunk driving charges? Then why was he here, looking at Lucy with such concern and asking about her well being?
Carter looked back down the hall, hoping to see someone who could get help. It was deserted. He flung the blanket he had brought for Lucy aside.
"Will she be all right?" Kerrigan asked again.
"Yeah, she's going to be fine," Carter said nervously, thinking that maybe he should take his chances and rush the guy. He hadn't thought twice about hauling him out of his car. But that was before he had discovered the guy was capable of attacking people with pipes.
"That's good." Kerrigan sounded genuinely relieved. "I never realized it before," he said softly. "She looks so much like Katie. My sweet Katie." With a quick shake of his head, he seemed to return to reality. "It was an accident, you know. I never meant to hit her."
So that was it? This was some sort of guilt trip? Carter decided to play along. "I know. It wasn't your fault. You just had a little too much to drink, that's all."
"No, that's not it!" Kerrigan said impatiently. "*You* were supposed to die!"
Carter's breath caught in his throat. He was completely stunned. "Me?"
"Yes, you...the all mighty Dr. Carter! I was aiming for you!" Kerrigan turned to look at Carter with cold, hate filled eyes.
Lucy stirred in her sleep, the loud voices waking her. Her eyes fluttered open. Kerrigan turned back to look down at her, mesmerized. "Katie?" he whispered.
"All right, I've had enough of this!" Carter had no idea what Kerrigan was rambling about, but he was obviously disturbed. "Step away from Lucy."
"John?" Lucy's voice sounded fearful.
"It's ok, Luce," Carter said soothingly. He had come closer to the bed now, and grabbed Kerrigan's arms. But the young man was surprisingly strong and he twisted out of Carter's grasp. A knife suddenly appeared in one of his hands, the blade glinting even in the dim glow of the lamp.
"Get back!" Kerrigan cried.
Carter immediately backed away from him, holding both hands in the air.
"Ok, man...take it easy."
"What is going on in here?" Cindy came rushing into the room, and Carter got hold of her sleeve, stopping her. She raised a hand to her open mouth in horror, seeing the terrified girl in bed and the stranger with the knife. "Oh, God..."
"Run...get security. Tell them it's Kerrigan," Carter said into Cindy's ear. She seemed rooted to the spot until Carter yanked at her sweater sleeve, hissing "Go!"
Cindy turned on her heel and ran down the hall. Luckily, Kerrigan didn't even seem to notice. Beads of sweat were starting to form on his forehead and upper lip. He was staring down at the knife and seemed uncertain what to do next.
"Hey, Kerrigan...Nick...why don't we go out into the hall?" Carter said quietly. He was desperate to get the man away from Lucy. "I'm the one you want, right?"
"Yeah." Kerrigan nodded. "You're the one. You're the one that killed Katie." He pointed the knife towards Carter. "Close the door."
"We don't have to do this here." Carter still hoped to lure Kerrigan away. "Come on, there's an empty room three doors down. We can..."
"CLOSE THE DOOR!" Kerrigan roared.
Carter did as he asked. Lucy trembled from shock and fear. From her vantage point on the bed, this man was looming over her. She thought she had been dreaming when she'd first looked up at him, only to find him confusing her with someone named Katie. Apparently Carter had killed this Katie. That seemed highly doubtful, but this man certainly believed it. Every time he looked at Carter, the hate burned through his eyes. And yet, when he had mistaken her for Katie, he had gazed down at her with such tenderness and love. He was delusional, perhaps psychotic. Lucy tried to recall something useful from her psychiatry textbooks but her mind was a blank.
The room was silent. They simply waited to see what Kerrigan would do. Carter kept giving Lucy reassuring glances, hoping she wasn't too afraid. She had already been through so much over the night, and now this.
"Turn the light on. It's too dark in here," Kerrigan ordered calmly.
Carter obliged, flicking the wall switch so the overhead fluorescent lights came on. They all blinked rapidly in the sudden flood of brightness.
Kerrigan pointed to a spot by the wall, fairly close to the door. "Sit down over there."
Carter sat down cross legged on the floor. Well, there was certainly no hope in rushing Kerrigan now. He was too far away.
"Who's Katie?" Lucy asked.
*Be quiet, Lucy!* Carter thought, wishing she wouldn't call attention to herself. But Kerrigan didn't seem to mind the question. He sat down heavily in the chair next to Lucy.
"She's my...was my wife. I loved her."
"Yes, I can tell."
Carter groaned inwardly. What was she doing? Did she think she could talk Kerrigan out of this?
"I loved her," Kerrigan repeated, glaring at Carter. "And he killed her."
"I don't know what you're talking about," Carter said, a little defensively.
"Shut up! I'm not talking to you!"
Carter decided that Lucy was doing better without his assistance. He leaned his head back against the wall, mentally zipping his mouth shut.
**********
Mark headed towards the admit desk, writing some notes on a patient's chart. Things had started picking up a bit in the ER, although they hadn't had a trauma come in for the past little while.
"Dr. Greene..."
"Yes, Jerry." He glanced up from the chart and found Jerry looking at him with a worried expression. "What is it?"
"I just got a call from a nurse on three. There's some guy holding Carter and Lucy hostage in her room."
"What! What guy?"
"I think she said his name is Kerrigan. I dunno. Security is already up there."
"Kerrigan..." Mark had heard that name before. It suddenly dawned on him. "That's the guy that hit Lucy."
Jerry's eyes widened. "The one that got away from the cops?"
"Yeah, I..." Mark was cut off as a highly distraught man burst through the double doors of the ambulance bay.
"Help! Somebody help me! My wife...in the car..."
Some nurses ran outside with him and Mark called out to Jerry as he turned away "Keep me informed on what's happening!"
"Sure thing, Dr. Greene."
**********
Carter silently watched as Lucy and Kerrigan held their quiet little conversation. He had to admit that Lucy was handling herself very well. She appeared calm and genuinely seemed to care about what Kerrigan was saying. So far he had told them about how much he had loved his wife, and that's about it. He just kept babbling on.
Carter still had trouble grasping the fact that Kerrigan had deliberately tried to run him down. Had seriously tried to kill him. And now he was here to do what? Finish off the job?
"So how did Katie die?" Lucy asked cautiously.
"He killed her!" Kerrigan glared at Carter again. Carter wisely didn't try to deny it this time.
"I don't understand what you mean," Lucy said, baffled.
Kerrigan heaved a tired sign. He explained that it was a year ago today, New Year's Day, that he and his wife had been in a car accident. He had only received minor injuries, but Katie had been badly hurt. He had been quite hysterical, and Dr. Carter had assured him that his wife would be just fine. Only she wasn't fine. She had died in the trauma room.
"Then he came out and started saying how sorry he was. That Katie's injuries had been too severe. They had used all their capabilities," Kerrigan said with a sneer. "But she was dead. One minute alive, the next minute dead."
Carter tried to remember the incident. A year ago? How many traumas had he seen since then? How many times had he given that same "I'm sorry" speech? The first time he had given it, he thought his heart was being ripped out of his chest. Now, although it was difficult, it had almost become...routine. No, that wasn't the right word. But it was simply part of his job and had become somewhat easier over time.
There were some patients that tugged at his heartstrings more than others and he remembered them long after they were gone. But Katie Kerrigan wasn't one of them. He truly could not remember her, and he felt a pang of guilt.
Kerrigan continued with his story, saying that he had been inconsolable after Katie's death. He had lost his job, lost his house. Had moved into a crappy little apartment. His rage had built up slowly, and several months ago he'd decided that Dr. Carter had to die. He wanted to wait until the anniversary of his wife's death. And tonight, he had found the perfect moment when Carter had been standing alone on the street.
"I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you," Kerrigan said to Lucy.
Lucy opened her mouth to speak but stopped when there was a knock on the door.
"Hey, is everything all right in there?" a male voice asked.
Carter guessed it was security. Or maybe the police, if they had already been called. "We're fine," he replied.
"Kerrigan, do *not* hurt those people, whatever you do. Why don't you come on out so we can talk?"
"Go away!" Kerrigan yelled, clearly getting agitated again.
After a pause, the voice said "Just remember, we're right outside. Don't do anything you'll regret."
Kerrigan stood and turned towards Carter, brandishing the knife. "It's time, Dr. Carter."
Carter got to his feet slowly, his body tense and ready to fight.
"Wait!" Lucy exclaimed, struggling to sit up on her elbows. "It's not Dr. Carter's fault! I was there...in the trauma room too."
Carter narrowed his eyes at her. Now what was she up to?
Kerrigan turned his attention back to Lucy. "I don't remember you being there." He looked confused.
"No, you probably wouldn't remember. There are a lot of people in a trauma. But I was there," she said emphatically. "I know Dr. Carter did everything right. He did *everything* he could. Katie was hurt too badly. That's why she died. It's not his fault," she finished softly.
Kerrigan pressed the fingers of one hand against his temples. He suddenly turned on Lucy, brining the knife close to her throat. "You're lying!" he cried.
Carter's heart jumped in fear and he started to rush forward. He stopped when he caught Lucy's eye and an almost imperceptible shake of her head. She was telling him to stay back. His instinct told him to tackle Kerrigan, but he chose to trust Lucy's judgment. For now.
Lucy looked up at Kerrigan with an air of calmness, trying to ignore the knife. Although she was shaking on the inside, she prayed her voice wouldn't betray her. "I'm not lying. And in your heart, you know it's true. Dr. Carter's not to blame. Maybe God is, but not Dr. Carter." She hesitated. "You're not a violent man. You had to get drunk before you tried to hit him with your car." She was only guessing that was why he'd been drinking, but she hoped it was close to the truth. She decided to take a risk with her next words. "Think of Katie...Would she want you to do this?"
Kerrigan hung his head, a sob catching in his throat. "No..." he whispered.
Lucy slowly extended her hand. "Please, Nick...give me the knife."
Kerrigan lowered his hand and placed the knife in her open palm. She immediately held it out of his reach, and Carter released the breath he had been holding. As Kerrigan broke down in tears, Carter opened the door and three police officers rushed in. They placed Kerrigan under arrest and he was led away, sobbing Katie's name.
Lucy gave the knife to one of the officers, who claimed it was evidence. She buried her face in her hands. "Oh, God." Her shoulders started shaking.
Carter sat down on the edge of the bed and held her tightly as she cried, rocking her gently back and forth. "It's ok," he said softly, rubbing her back and kissing her hair. "Let it out...you were so brave. You deserve to cry." He looked up at the officer who remained in the room, wanting to get a statement. "Could you give us a minute?"
"Sure." He left the room to give them some privacy.
Lucy wept for another minute, as Carter murmured soothing words in her ear. Her tears finally subsided, and she wiped at her eyes. Carter reached for some tissues on the table behind him and handed them to her.
"Thanks. Sorry about that." Now that the adrenaline was fading from her system, Lucy could feel her aches and pains returning. She had almost forgotten about her injuries during the whole incident with Kerrigan.
"Please, don't apologize," Carter said, brushing strands of hair back from her face. "Looks like you saved me again."
Lucy grunted. "Hardly. I had no idea what I was doing. I'm just glad...he didn't hurt you."
"Or you. God, Luce, when he had that knife at your throat, I..." His voice trailed off and he hugged her close again. Lucy felt a warm glow spreading through her body as she enjoyed his comforting arms around her. After a moment he drew back and looked down at her. "Seriously, though. You were great with him. I was so proud of you."
"Really?" Lucy smiled up at him, her heart filled with joy at his words.
"Really. Have you had your psych rotation yet?"
"No, not yet. I think it's after my surgical rotation." She chuckled. "I probably won't be doing much surgery with this leg, though. Maybe I can do psych first."
"Well, I'm thinking you'd be a great psychiatrist. You should consider it." Carter paused, deep in thought. Maybe this could work. "You know," he said slowly. "You're only in the ER for a few more weeks. Well, maybe longer depending how soon you can get back to work..."
"Uh huh." Lucy wasn't sure what he was getting at.
"So I thought...uh, maybe you and I could...I mean, when you're no longer my student..."
"Dr. Carter, are you asking me out?" Lucy couldn't disguise the delight in her voice.
"Yeah, I guess I am." Carter looked towards the door, relieved that no one was listening in on them. He turned back to Lucy and smiled at the obvious happiness in her face.
"I thought this wasn't the right time," she teased.
"It isn't. Not yet, anyway." He reached for her hand, bringing it to his lips and kissing it gently. "We just have to be patient," he said softly. "I think we could be good together."
"Me too," Lucy whispered. She leaned forward, focusing in on Carter's mouth...
A loud knock at the door made them both jump apart. "Excuse me. Can I get a statement from you two now?" the officer asked, trying not to smile as they looked at him with guilty expressions.
Carter quickly got to his feet. "Yeah, sure."
As the officer began to question her, Carter and Lucy exchanged glances, sharing a secret smile.
--------------------------
Feedback is welcomed and appreciated!
Shirley yoshinaka@sprint.ca
Thank you :)
