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Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from ER. They
are
the property of Warner Brothers, etc.
Author's Note: The last episode seen was "The Peace of Wild Things",
but this series will not contain any spoilers for Season 6.
If you've seen up to "Getting to Know You", you're safe.
Previous Chapters: First Time For Everything, Across the Way,
All in a Day's Work, A Hard Day's Night,
The Calm Before the Storm, Aftershocks,
Reflections, Awakenings
Archive Info: Please do not archive this story without my permission.
This series can be found on Alan's EROnline site at
http://erfanfiction.freeservers.com/shirl/
and on Evie's John and Lucy's Fanfic Lounge at
http://www.angelfire.com/mb/greatfic/TheLounge.html
TITLE: Life Goes On
Part Nine of a series
AUTHOR: Shirley
yoshinaka@sprint.ca
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After spending the night for observation in the hospital, Lucy was
discharged the next day. Mark and Kerry gave her a few days off,
even though she protested it wasn't necessary. She was also initially
annoyed when Mark insisted she speak with a counsellor. She argued
that she was feeling fine, but finally conceded that she wasn't being
objective about the situation. If a patient had come to her with
similar problems, she probably would have recommended counselling too.
She spent most of the weekend with her mother. They caught up on
everything that had been happening in their lives, promising to keep
in close touch with each other. Growing up, Lucy had been proud of
how strong and independent her mother was. She had vowed to grow up
to be just like her. Now Lucy loved being on her own, but it was
nice to be taken care of for a change. Even if it was just for the
weekend.
On Monday, the memorial service for Brad was held. The large church
was packed with people. Lucy had no idea who the majority of them were.
Her mother was more familiar with many of them, having done business
with Thomas Prescott for several years. For the most part, Lucy remained
by her mother's side, shaking hands and exchanging condolences. While she
was sad, she no longer felt overwhelmed by guilt. A small sliver of it
remained, but that would fade with time. At least, she hoped so.
The day was cold and grey. Rather fitting for this somber occasion.
Coming directly from the church, they stood now at the grave site,
gathered around the head stone. The minister was coming to his closing
remarks and Lucy glanced at Mr. Prescott. His face was marred with grief
but overall, he appeared composed and dignified.
First his wife, now his son. Lucy swallowed hard, her vision blurring.
Then suddenly it was over and people began to move about. She somehow
lost her mother in the crowd and found herself backing out of everyone's
way.
"Hi." A quiet, familiar voice.
She looked up, brushing at her eyes. "Hi."
Carter passed her a handkerchief. He watched as her lips curved slightly
upwards.
"You're the only guy I know who carries one of these, Carter." She used
the soft, white cloth to dab at her wet cheeks.
"My grandfather always said a gentleman should never leave the house
without one. Guess that rule kind of stuck." He gave a small smile
and then grew serious. "So how are you holding up?"
He had arrived just minutes earlier, scanning the sea of faces.
He'd finally spotted her, looking rather forlorn and lost on the edge
of the crowd.
"I'm ok." She caught his probing glance, as if he wasn't quite convinced.
"Really."
"Are you eating? You look thinner."
That made her chuckle. "I'm wearing two sweaters under this bulky coat,
and you think I look thinner? Come on, Carter. Besides, my mom has
been taking good care of me. She even made homemade chicken soup."
"How much longer is she staying?" He was glad that Lucy had been looked
after this weekend. It had eased his worries to know that Vicky had been
staying with her.
"She's flying back this afternoon." She handed the handkerchief back to
him.
"Thanks."
"Mark told me you've got a few days off." She grunted in response,
and her expressive face told him exactly what she thought of that.
"It's not so bad." He almost smiled. "You should try to enjoy it."
"Everyone is acting like I'm going to fall apart any second." She directed
a level gaze at him. "You included."
Carter shifted his feet uncomfortably. It was on the tip of his tongue to
say he was concerned about her, but that's not what she needed to hear.
"I don't think that," he finally stated, returning her direct look.
"You've been through a lot, but I think you're handling things pretty well."
Lucy searched his eyes, but she wasn't sure if he really meant what he said.
She decided to let the matter drop. Considering her behaviour, she couldn't
blame people for questioning her mental state. She would have to prove
that she was truly ok. "Listen, I never got a chance to really thank you
for what you did the other night. Dr. Weaver told me how you spent the
whole night searching for me."
"I'm just glad I found you. Promise me you'll never do anything like
that again." He regarded her solemnly, recalling how worried he'd been.
It was a feeling of helplessness he didn't want to experience again.
She nodded. "I promise."
"Lucy, there you are." Vicky approached them and came to stand by
her daughter, placing an arm around her shoulders. "Sorry I lost you
for a minute."
"It's ok. Carter was keeping me company."
Vicky exchanged greetings with him and they chatted for a brief while.
"It was good of you to come, John. Some of us are getting together for
lunch. Would you like to join us?" she asked.
"I'm afraid I can't. I should be heading over to the hospital." He had
actually been running late when leaving the apartment, and had almost
changed his mind about stopping by here. But he'd heard about where the
service was being held and had wanted to see Lucy. Even though they
lived across the hall from each other, the last time he'd seen her was
just before she'd been discharged from County. It was silly but in that
short span they'd been apart, he'd missed her.
"Well then, I guess it's goodbye. I'm heading back to New York
this afternoon," Vicky stated. She impulsively gave him a hug, not caring
that her daughter was probably embarrassed by her actions. As she
pulled back, she could see by the look on his face that she'd taken him
by surprise. "Thank you again for all you've done."
"You're welcome," he murmured, ducking his head in a rather boyishly
charming way. "I'd better get going. Take care, Vicky." He took a few
steps back and his gaze slid to Lucy's. "See you later."
"Bye Carter." As he walked away, he was almost out of hearing range
when she called after him. "Tell Dr. Weaver and Dr. Greene I'm coming
in to work first thing on Wednesday!" He briefly turned his head and
gave a wave to indicate he'd heard her.
"What was that about?" Vicky inquired, giving her daughter a curious glance.
"Oh, nothing."
"Nice of him to stop by."
Lucy had to agree with that. "Yeah, it was." She'd been surprised to
suddenly find him standing before her. She hadn't given it much thought
at the time, but it did seem a bit odd. He really hadn't known Brad,
so why would he have come here?
"He must have wanted to see how you're doing."
Leave it to her mother to answer a question she hadn't even spoken aloud.
Lucy mulled over that possibility. Could that really be the reason?
Oh, what did it matter anyway. She'd stopped trying to figure out Carter's
motivation for doing things long ago, starting with the Exam 6 fiasco.
She'd been hurt by his rejection then. And while he'd hid behind the
excuse of teacher/student conflict, she'd spent countless hours wondering
what the real reason had been for his quick dismissal of her.
The last thing she needed in her life was more complications. If Carter
was being unusually attentive towards her lately, it was only out of
concern.
Certainly he was a friend, but that's where the line was drawn. He had
drawn it himself two years ago and she had reluctantly accepted it.
Now she'd grown comfortable with the way things were. In fact, she *liked*
the way things were between them. She'd almost forgotten what a good
listener he was; how gentle and kind he could be. Over the last two years
they'd grown apart, each busy with their own lives. She didn't realize
how much she'd missed their rooftop chats or sharing a drink in the lounge,
discussing the day's events.
In the last week or so, something had changed and they were talking like
old friends again. It was...well, nice, for want of a better word.
A truly good friend was a rare find and something she could appreciate.
"Ready to go?"
Lucy was startled out of her thoughts and looked at her mother.
"Yes, I'm ready." She glanced around and saw that everyone else had
moved on.
Once again, Vicky put an arm around her shoulder and they slowly made
their way across the cemetery. It was eerily quiet, as if the world had
come to a sudden standstill. Then the unnatural silence was broken by
the sound of children's laughter from a nearby school as they burst
through the doors for lunch. And life went on.
***************
After seeing her mother off at the airport, Lucy spent some quiet time
by herself. She took a long, leisurely bath in the evening and even
lit some candles that she'd been saving. Exactly what she'd been saving
them for, she didn't know. She usually received them as gifts from
friends and always thought it was a shame to burn them. She now realized
how silly that was. Why not enjoy them?
The warm bath made her sleepy and she decided to go to bed early. It had
been a long day but surprisingly, not unpleasant. It had been sad, yes.
Sad for her personally and sadder still for Brad's family. But she was
hopeful that she could now put the past behind her. She wanted to make
a fresh start. Since beginning her ER sub-I, she'd found herself losing
perspective about the work, only focusing on the negative aspects.
She couldn't let that happen again.
The next morning she woke up fairly early. She snuggled under the covers,
a little reluctant to leave the warmth of the bed. With a sigh, she got up
and quickly put on a robe. After her usual morning routine, she went into
the kitchen and remembered she hadn't thrown out yesterday's garbage.
Rubbing at her eyes, she opened the door. The door across the hall opened
a second later and Carter appeared with a basket full of laundry.
They stared wordlessly at each other for a moment. Lucy started to say
good morning, when she saw something small and black run between
Carter's feet.
"Oh, damn!" he exclaimed, dropping the basket to the floor. "Catch
her!"
Lucy hadn't been fully awake when she'd first seen the animal, and it
finally registered in her brain that the black furball was a kitten.
Before she could even move, the kitten shot past her feet into her
apartment. Lucy chased after her around the couch, into the kitchen,
and back into the living room. Carter came inside and closed the door,
effectively cutting off the hallway as an escape route. He crouched
down near the floor and tried to head her off. The kitten would have
none of it, and made a beeline for the bedroom.
Lucy stopped her pursuit. "We're probably scaring the poor thing,"
she said, slightly out of breath. "I didn't know you have a cat."
"I just got her. Found her on Kerry's doorstep last week." He stood
up and explained the story. No one had come forward to claim her,
so he'd gone to Jerry's the night before and brought the kitten home.
In the short time she'd spent at Jerry's place, he'd trained her to
use the litter box. Carter was grateful for that.
"Hmm, I don't picture Jerry as a cat person," Lucy said.
"Oh no?" Carter raised an eyebrow. "A dog person, then?"
"Yeah, definitely a dog. A big, friendly St. Bernard."
He had to laugh at the image. "Sorry about this, Luce. I didn't mean
to disrupt your morning." It was obvious she'd just gotten out of bed.
Her hair was still mussed and she looked rather rumpled. His eyes lit up
with amusement as he took in her pink slippers. He bit the inside of
his lip to hold back a comment, but couldn't hide his smile. Fortunately,
Lucy assumed he was still thinking about Jerry and his non-existent dog.
"So what's her name?" she asked, heading to the bedroom.
"Millie." He followed close behind.
"Millie? That's cute." Lucy surveyed the room and wondered when it had
become such a mess. It needed cleaning badly. She was mildly embarrassed
with Carter here, but wasn't about to apologize for it. She would bet
anything that his apartment was neat as a pin.
"Yeah, I named her after my grandmother." He smirked slightly, trying
to picture how Gamma would react to this news. He didn't think she'd
be too impressed. He'd thought of the name on a whim, but now it seemed
to suit the kitten.
Lucy had left the closet door open and she checked in there first.
No cat. Then she got down on her hands and knees to look under the bed.
Bingo. "Here kitty," she said softly, in what she hoped was her most
enticing voice. The kitten simply stared back at her, green eyes glowing.
She sighed. "This isn't working."
She got to her feet and Carter shrugged his shoulders. "She'll come out
eventually. So what are your plans for the day?"
"I haven't thought about it yet. Perhaps a nice, relaxing day of doing
nothing."
He smiled. "Nothing is good. Everyone at work misses you."
She twirled one finger through her hair. A nervous habit. "Are people,
uh, talking about me?"
He pretended not to know what she meant. "Talking about you?"
"You know...because of what happened with Brad." She knew what a hotbed
of gossip the ER could be. And admittedly, she was sometimes guilty of
chattering about other people's business herself. She couldn't blame
them for talking.
"There was some talk," he said honestly. "But for the most part,
it was because people were concerned about you." That was mostly true.
There had been some mean-spirited remarks and rumours as well,
but they'd been quickly quashed by Kerry and himself.
Carter's eye caught some movement and he looked down. "Don't move,"
he cautioned.
Lucy stiffened. "Why?"
He nodded his head towards the floor and she glanced at her feet.
Millie had ventured out from under the bed and was sniffing at her
slippers. She then rubbed her head against the thick, pink fluff
and proceeded to lie on top of one foot, purring all the while.
Carter couldn't hold in his laugh. "At least one of us likes them."
"Hey, enough with the cracks about my slippers," she said with mock
annoyance. Bending down, she scooped up the kitten and held her
in one arm.
"I should get going," Carter said finally. "I've got tons of stuff
to do before my shift."
"Afternoon shift again?"
"Yeah. I hope Millie will be ok."
"I'm sure she'll be fine. Jerry must have left her alone when he worked,"
Lucy reasoned. She rubbed the kitten behind one ear, enjoying the rumbling,
contended sound of purring.
"I guess she will be. I'm worrying for nothing."
"I could look after her today," she offered. "I was planning on staying
in all day anyway."
"Would you? That would be great, Luce. Here, I'll give you my spare key."
He kept one in his wallet and he reached into his back pocket.
"You sure you trust me?"
"Absolutely." He paused and gave her an inquisitive look. "Shouldn't
I?"
"Absolutely," she echoed, grinning.
They went back to his apartment. Carter noted that no one had bothered
to steal the basket of dirty laundry he'd dropped in the hallway.
He apologized about the place being so messy. He still hadn't managed
to unpack everything yet. But at least he'd found the time to buy a
couch and coffee table yesterday.
Lucy took in her surroundings with curiosity, but there really wasn't
much to see yet. No photographs or knick knacks that would reveal
anything about Carter. Those kinds of things must still be packed away.
But she couldn't believe he considered this to be a mess. Her apartment
came close to looking this good after a day of cleaning, but then it
didn't take long to revert back to its naturally messy state.
Carter told Lucy that he'd be leaving around 11:30 to go into work.
He thanked her again for doing this. He knew Millie would have to get
used to being on her own. But he felt it would be nice to have someone
around on the first full day in her new home.
Lucy let Carter get on with his busy day and she went back to her place.
Although she had planned on doing nothing for the day, seeing his
apartment had made her feel guilty about neglecting her domestic duties.
She got to work and before she knew it, Carter was knocking on her door
to let her know he was leaving.
After a frenzy of dusting, scrubbing, and vacuuming, she felt oddly
refreshed. It had felt good to release some pent up energy. Deciding to
look in on the cat, she headed across the hall. Opening and closing the
door quickly to prevent another escape, she was greeted by a meow.
"Well Millie, guess it's just you and me."
Millie only blinked in response.
***************
It was well past 1 a.m. when Carter returned home. He fumbled with
the lamp switch and after a moment, the room was lit with a soft glow.
Tossing his bag near the door, he removed his boots and coat. Man, he was
exhausted. The afternoon had been pretty uneventful, but then they'd been
inundated with multiple traumas after the dinner hour. He hadn't had a
chance to sit down after seven o'clock.
Looking forward to getting into bed, he stopped short as he approached
the couch. It seemed he had a visitor.
Lucy was curled up on her side, her mouth slightly parted and her breathing
slow and even. Millie was also sleeping soundly, almost on top of
Lucy's head. She had obviously found a comfortable spot.
Chuckling softly to himself, Carter went to his bedroom to get an extra
comforter that he had actually unpacked and put away in his closet.
He briefly considered waking her, but she seemed to be sleeping deeply.
He thought it best to let her rest. Hopefully she'd be warm enough
with the comforter.
Covering her up gently, he resisted the urge to drop a kiss on her
upturned cheek. Exactly when or how this girl had crept into his heart,
he didn't know. But he did know that he now couldn't imagine his life
without her.
